Syn:Sex Is Syn, Love Is Pain(2)

By: J Peach

“Remember I told y’all he was supposed to come down to Lafayette and spend the weekend with us” Peaches continued, “but he didn’t come because King had a party or whatnot? Y’all know how these hoes be out here. All I’m saying is, Blaze wouldn’t sleep with one of them, but he would probably get some head no doubt. Especially since I hadn’t given him no blow. So I snapped on his ass about it and then called Momma, told her I was gon’ leave him if I found out somebody sucked him off,” Peaches rolled her eyes at Bianca.

I looked at her and laughed. “And like Momma said, nann one of you gonna leave the other. If he got sucked off by somebody else that’s yo fault. You should’ve gave that nigga some head.”

“Same shit I said. What you won’t do another hoe will. Boon,” Bianca said, calling Blaze by the nickname she had given him, “was triflin’, but he’s not no more, so you don’t have to worry about him. Peaches, you know that man like nobody else. You know when his ass be lying or hiding some shit—”

In the middle of Bianca speaking truth to Peaches, Ebony suddenly jumped up and ran out of the living room with her hand over her mouth. Worried, I started to go after her, but Peaches pulled me back down.

“I got it,” she said as she stood up and went after Ebony.

“She’s okay,” Bianca said before looking back at me. “As I was saying, all these heffas come to me with their men and women problems except for you. I’mma tell you, Angel, I want grandbabies and a lot of them. Peaches and Blaze are frozen right now due to their issues, but the rest of you heffas better start popping them babies out. And y’all don’t even have to slow down your careers. Hell, I can babysit,” she clapped her hands together excitedly.

Missy, Kim, and I looked at each other and broke out laughing. “Yeah, you gon’ be waiting a long time for me. I can’t have no kids, I’d rather be the cool auntie,” I said as I rejected the idea of having kids. Children were something I never saw in my future and I wasn’t about to start thinking to have any now.

“I’m starting to think you don’t like men, Angel. I swear I have never heard you talk about a dude you like. If you like women that’s cool, too. I wouldn’t love you any less. Hell, look at Missy ass. I love her to death and she goes into detail about the women she mess with. Lord, have mercy on my ears when she calls,” Bianca’s head shook.

Again we broke out laughing.

“Um, she’s right here,” Missy pointed to herself. “Momma, you wrong. I bet I don’t call yo ass no more. Watch, I’ll confide in my bitches from here on out,” Missy’s eyes rolled as she got up and moved away from Bianca.

Bianca’s hand shot out and she smacked Missy on the ass. “Please do. I won’t be upset, I promise I won’t.”

Missy came over and flopped down next to me. I laughed at them, they were my family and they were all crazy as hell. “Momma, you wrong, Missy not that bad,” I said, hoping to make Missy feel better. “And I’m not gay, I just haven’t found that guy for me. I’m not rushing to find him either.” I wasn’t looking for a relationship. It consisted of too many things I wasn’t yet ready to give.

“I have to disagree, Ang,” Kimmy chimed in. “Missy’s conversations do be a bit out there. And her coochie hella friendly. She got a different female every day of the week,” she snapped her fingers as she sang.

“Wait, ain’t you hopping between two dicks, though?” Missy looked at Kimmy with disbelief on her face. “So how you judging, Kim?”

I broke out laughing. “Girl, you know Kim don’t see her own wrong, but can point out everybody else’s.” Kim had her nerve.

“Fuck both of y’all. Ugh, stupid asses,” Kim snapped as she stuck up her middle finger at us.

Missy, Bianca, and I laughed at her comeback just as Peaches and Ebony walked back into the room. The wide smile on Peaches’ face had my brows scrunching together. I nudged Missy and pointed to the pair.

“Oh, shit! Peach got that I’m about to scream look. What is it?” Missy asked them.

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