Beard Mode

By: Lani Lynn Vale


 Scooters are for men who prefer to feel wind on their vagina.

 -Bumper Sticker


 “You ready for this, man?” Truth asked me.

 I turned to Truth and glared.

 “Why are you called Truth again?” I asked him.

 He grinned. “I don’t know.”

 I rolled my eyes. The man did know, he just didn’t want to tell me. “Whatever,” I spat. “That’s just despicable.”

 Truth laughed and slapped me on the back.

 “Come on, fucker. You know you’re ready for our brand of crazy.” Truth tugged on my leather jacket, and I followed him. Reluctantly.

 I was always reluctant when it came to crowds nowadays.

 I lifted my fingers and ran the tips over my burned, scarred face.

 Fucking bitch.

 I can’t believe I let her do that to me.

 So stupid!

 Even now, a year and a half later, I was still kicking my own ass.

 Should’ve taken my mom up on the offer to stay in her house, hundreds of miles away years ago. Gotten away from my crazy now ex-wife before she went all psycho and fucked up my awesome life.

 “You coming?” Truth pushed.

 I nodded my head, took a deep breath, and walked into the hall with the rest of The Dixie Wardens.

 Taking a look around, I pasted on a fake half-smile and became the newest patched-in member of The Dixie Wardens MC-Alabama Chapter. Also known as The Dixie Warden Rejects.

Chapter 1

 I’m just going to put an ‘out of order’ sticker on my forehead and call it a day.



 10 months later

 “New guy,” someone muttered behind me.

 I turned only my head to find Stone, the president, staring at me with hard eyes.

 “Yeah?” I asked him, dropping my bag on the floor and heading in his direction instead of out the door like I’d originally intended.

 “You’re here because you have a special set of skills that we need,” the leader of our band of misfits, Stone, drawled.

 I nearly laughed.

 “That sounds like a line out of a bad movie,” I muttered, wondering where he was going with this.

 He tossed me a glare and then yelled.

 “Truth!” Stone yelled. “Ghost! Get the fuck in here!”

 Ghost and Truth walked in the door at the same time, both of them turning to the side to walk through the standard sized doorway. Neither one of them gave up their ground and let the other go first.

 The moment they were inside, they both stared at Stone.

 “Ghost, hold Truth down so New Guy can give him the fuckin’ shot,” Stone grumbled.

 Ghost tackled Truth and wrestled him to the desk, then sat on him while Stone leaned back and watched.

 “No, motherfucker!” Truth yelled. “I don’t want it!”

 “It’s the fuckin’ flu shot, you dumb shit. Not a fuckin’ tracking device. Take a fuckin’ chill pill,” Stone grumbled, staring at the scuffle that was going down in front of him.

 I picked up the syringe from the table, similar to the one I’d used to give everyone else their flu shots with, and stabbed it into the meat of Truth’s arm.

 Truth bellowed in rage, and I flipped the guard up on the syringe before tossing it into the trash can.

 “Done?” I asked Stone. “I have to get to work.”

 Stone nodded.

 “Yeah, thanks.” He nodded. “Have fun at the nuthouse.”

 I grunted something unintelligible, causing him to laugh.

 “Don’t sound so excited,” he laughed.

 I flipped him off and walked out the door just as Ghost was letting Truth up.

 “Why you gotta be such a big motherfucker?” Truth growled. “If you’d been anyone else, I’d have gotten away.”

 “Why do you think I called Ghost instead of anyone else?” I heard Stone’s amused reply.

 I snorted and headed to the bag of trash that I’d abandoned, but stopped to fish out my phone from my pocket when I felt it start vibrating.

 “Hello?” I answered as I picked my bag up once again and started heading out for my bike.