Deflowering Rose (First Time, Family Taboo)(3)

By: Madelene Martin

“Sit still,” he instructed. “And just kind of… mirror what I do.” He took a deep breath, seeming to steel himself, then leaned slowly toward me. I tried to relax and not to laugh, closing my eyes and breathing steadily.

I felt his lips brush mine. A moment’s hesitation, then he pressed his mouth firmly against me. His mouth was soft and warm, and he smelled like wine. I felt his lips part, and obediently copied the action, letting my mouth open slightly. Our breath mingled, and I thought vaguely to myself that that was kind of nice.

I was approaching the kiss like a lesson, studying it, trying to memorise the moves. But when he tilted his head, and I did the same, and his tongue ever-so-gently entered my mouth and caressed mine, I completely forgot about paying attention.

It was soft and sweet at first. His tongue teased mine, until I began to respond, caressing his tongue and dancing with it, in my mouth and in his. I melted toward him, winding my arms around his neck, and he wrapped his arms around my waist. Suddenly his hesitation was gone and he was pulling me closer. I pressed my upper body willingly against him, a strange but pleasant electric feeling running through me.

I heard my own soft sound of pleasure as he sucked gently on my lower lip, and I tried gently nibbling his in response. Alec pressed hard against me, and I realized we were reclining back onto the couch, his body over mine. I didn’t mind. My breasts were pushing right up against his hard chest, and I could feel my nipples harden and become extra sensitive. It was a good feeling. I began to run my hands over his back and shoulders, appreciating the tensing and un-tensing of his muscles as our tongues continued their dance.

The kiss was heated now, and I could sense his urgency. Unexpectedly, it thrilled me. One of his hands began to wander, moving over my waist, and down my outer thigh. I felt little shivers of pleasure ripple through my skin, as he pushed his hand up under my short skirt. I also felt myself grow wet between my legs, unfamiliar heat spreading out from my sex.

He broke away from our kiss, placing his mouth on my neck, and sucking gently on my skin. I couldn’t help letting out a little moan of pleasure.

My sound seemed to bring him back to his senses, and he stopped suddenly, pulling away and looking into my eyes. His breathing was heavy and fast, and I realized belatedly that I could feel how hard he was down below, pressing against my hip. I bit my lip, trying to stop myself from grinding against him. Wanting more. What was happening to me?

“Sorry.” Alec murmured, his voice hoarse. He cleared his throat, and pulled away from me. The absence of his hand on my skin and his body against mine made me feel cold. I sat up, tried to stop him before he ran off, but his hand slipped through mine. He left the room, and I sat by myself, panting slightly and clothes askew, completely confused as to what had just happened.


Alec didn’t surface for the rest of the day, and I heard him leave the house the next morning, yelling out that he was going shopping. I was miserable, thinking I’d ruined our relationship forever. I tried to give him space, hoping it would all blow over. But I also kept replaying our kiss over and over in my head.

I went to the movie with Sean, grateful for the distraction as much as the opportunity to be out with a cute guy. It was a fun movie, and Sean was nice. In his car afterwards, he kissed me. To my great relief and surprise, I wasn’t paralyzed with nerves. He was gentle, and obviously not as experienced as Alec. He used a little too much tongue at first, I thought - however, he seemed to adjust to my style and it ended up being a nice kiss. Closing my eyes, though, I found myself imagining I was with Alec. Instead of Sean’s face I pictured my brother’s. It was his lips on mine, his hands in my hair.

Feeling guilty, I cut it short, thanking Sean for a lovely day and getting out of the car. I ran inside and slammed the front door behind me.

“Are you okay?” Alec asked, looking up from the table where he sat with his lunch. He didn’t look embarrassed or awkward anymore, for which I was grateful. So I sat with him and made small talk about the movie. He didn’t ask questions, and I avoided mentioning the goodbye kiss. As soon as I could, I made an excuse - saying I was tired so I could escape to my bedroom. I felt his eyes on me as I ran up the stairs.

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