Infinite DesireBy: Danielle Jamie
Savannah 16 hours earlier
Climbing into bed at my parents’ house, I slide under the covers and curl into a ball. Gripping my comforter in one hand and my phone in the other, I stare at the screen. I just sent Kayden a text telling him I need to talk, but don’t know if he’s sleeping or not. I keep watching the time on my screen change, each second feels like an eternity.
I’m emotionally drained and feeling completely shattered. I walked away from Kayden after he begged for me to stay. Why didn’t I just stay? I had every right to be scared and think that Kayden slept with Nadia. I’ve been cheated on before and was completely clueless about how to handle these accusations. All I keep telling myself since the day I left Texas is that I should’ve gone with my gut. I knew deep down Kayden loved me and only me. He’s not given me any reason to doubt his faithfulness. He took a chance on love when we jumped into this crazy beautiful relationship of ours. He gave me what he has given no other women since Lulu…His heart. I can’t even begin to imagine how he’s feeling right now. I stomped on his heart and made him feel that I didn’t trust him.
My phone starts playing Cowboys and Angels; I changed Kayden’s ringtone the night of my birthday. It’s the first song Kayden ever sang to me, and then he had Dustin Lynch sing it to us as we danced on my birthday. I just knew it was the perfect choice for Kayden. It’s a lot better than Ginuwine’s Pony that Kayden set as his ringtone back in December when he was a tad drunk.
I can’t help but smile thinking back to the simpler times; us being carefree and enjoying bon fires on the beach. Little did I know that entire time Jacob and Zak were planning to kidnap me and hold me for ransom. Since then my life has been a non-stop roller coaster ride of ups and downs.
Taking in a deep breath, I close my eyes and slowly exhale. “Hey…” I answer; my voice low and shaky. My nerves are on edge after the run in with Giselle, Logan and Nadia tonight.
“Hey baby. What’s up…Everything okay?” I immediately relax hearing Kayden’s voice.
Trying to ignore the butterflies fluttering in my stomach from hearing Kayden call me baby, I decide to just jump straight to the point. “I just got in from Vertigo; you’ll never guess who Brooklyn and I ran into tonight.”
I can hear Kayden moving around in bed on the other end. It makes me miss him even more laying in this bed all alone. It feels like forever since I’ve been in his arms.
“Do I want to even know?” He asks sarcastically.
“Yea, well, Brooklyn spotted Giselle and Logan partying together in Vertigo…I guess they’re an item now. But they weren’t alone, Nadia was there too.” The words taste foul in my mouth. Talking about them makes my stomach churn. I have so much anger boiling inside of me.
I can hear Kayden cursing under his breath; I can just picture him running his strong fingers continuously through his light brown hair. I hate having to have this conversation over the phone.
“If they did anything to upset you Savannah…I swear to God.” Kayden says angrily, his drawl thick and raspy. It always gets thicker when he’s pissed off.
Letting out a sigh, I fight back the tears welling up in my eyes. We’ve mainly been texting back and forth to keep in touch since I came back to LA. Hearing his voice was just too hard, so I’ve refrained from calling him. Hearing him now; even thousands of miles away, my body aches for his arms to be around me. I’m not complete without Kayden by my side. Knowing even after what I’ve put him through while trying to figure all this out, he still loves me and worries about me is just amazing.
“It was a good thing we found them there. I confronted Nadia and she confessed to me that everything she said was a lie. I cannot tell you enough how sorry I am for doubting you. I was just so scared…” My voice trails off and cracks as I fight the tears threatening to break the flood gates. I take in and let out short even breaths as I try to compose myself.
“That lying bitch finally decided to tell the truth now! Well isn’t that nice of her.” The bitterness in Kayden’s voice pierces my heart. This woman put us through hell all because of Giselle. “What do you want me to say Savannah? I told you…hell I begged you to believe me. I was never unfaithful to you. I’m not Logan! Do you think it’s easy for me after what Luanne put me through to trust you?”